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Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Fell On Dark Days

Could we have a moment of silence please... *sob*

I'm in mourning. I've heard terrible tragedies happen in threes and to this I can attest. What did I do to have such horrors visited upon me? I'm nice, okay not so much. I'm a good person, well good enough anyway. I've a kind word for everyone, well maybe that's a downright lie. But still I didn't deserve this. No one does!

Tragedy #1

I was melting chocolate last night to dip my caramel rice krispy balls in. I have two, yes two, Wilton chocolate melters but did I use them last night? No. For big jobs I use the double boiler method. So I had my saucepan gently boiling with one of my favorite heavy glass mixing bolls set on it and I was stirring my nearly perfectly melted satiny chocolate when...

CRACK!!!

My bowl broke. *sob* One of my favorite mixing bowls has gone to the great bowl home in the sky. And to add insult to injury the steam from the pan seeped through the cracks and completely ruined my chocolate. Seized it and turned it from silk to paste in seconds.

Tragedy #2

IT WAS MY LAST BAG OF CHOCOLATE! So I don't have any finished 100 Grand Truffles to show you because they're NOT DONE! Oh the heartbreak.

Tragedy #3

Last night was Horrible Movie Night Monday. Well my friends, I'm also mourning the hour and a half of my life I will never get back. We watched John Carpenter's "They Live". Three words: Rowdy. Roddy. Piper. Can I get an amen from the 80's wrestling fans out there?

With a tagline of: "A drifter discovers a pair of sunglasses that allow him to wake up to the fact that aliens have taken over the Earth." and that the same guy did "The Thing" how could we go wrong? Oh man, I think last weeks gem "Double Dragon" was BETTER if you can believe that.

Let me share some of my pain:

Nada (yes Rowdy Roddy Piper's name in the movie was Nada): Life's a bitch...and she's back in heat.

Nada: You see, I take these glasses off, she looks like a regular person, doesn't she? Put 'em back on... (puts them on) Formaldehyde-face!

Nada: (after disarming a human cop) Beat yer feet.

Nada: I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass... and I'm all out of bubblegum.

The first half of the movie Rowdy Roddy barely talks and when he starts talking you understand why. The man cannot deliver a line to save his life and his acting isn't much better. The first 1/2 hour of the movie is him wandering around a city. The best part of the movie was when Meg Foster (a woman he kidnaps and she drives him to her HOME) hits Rowdy in the back of the head with a wine bottle breaking it on his dome and then pushing him through a closed sliding glass door window with enough force for him to break through it. Then watching him careen down the side of a mountain and get up with barely a scratch and stumble (unconvincingly, I might add) away.

This movie could've been condensed into a half an hour and not lost any of it's cheese, horridness, or story. But it did it's job and kept the horrible streak going for our Monday night entertainment. So I guess I should be thankful.

I'm buying more chocolate today. Hopefully barring any other disasters I will have pictures to post with the recipe tomorrow.

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